Book Title:Never Let Go
Author:Nicola Haken
Genre: New Adult
Release Date:April 2, 2014
Hosted by: Book Enthusiast Promotions
“I don’t have time for this, Dad,” I muttered on a heavy sigh.
“Please, son. Don’t go, not yet. Let’s have another coffee, then if you still feel the same, we’ll go back to how things were. Apart.”
“No, I don’t mean right now. I mean I really haven’t got time to keep hating you. There are so many things wrong with what you’ve just told me, there are three thousand reasons why I should walk out of here and never look back, and I genuinely don’t know how you can ever make this right with Emmie. But… I won’t be here in twelve months time, Dad. I can’t spend those months fighting with you – reasoning with you… struggling to understand what you did.
“In order for me to have any hope of enjoying these next few months of life, I can’t afford to dwell on the past. I don’t understand the decisions you’ve made in your life, Dad, but I accept them, and… I forgive you.”
I noticed tears bubbling up in the corners of my dad’s eyes and I had to force myself to look away before mine started falling too. It took all my strength not to be mad at him. Why couldn’t he have done this years ago? Back when I really needed him.
“And they’re sure? The doctors?” he asked with a slight tremor in his voice. Why does everyone ask that? It seems like doctors are classed as superheroes until they tell you something bad.
“Positive. I had my first chemo session a couple of weeks ago. I have another in two days. That should slow it down… but only by a few months and nothing’s guaranteed.”
“Months?” he repeated – barely a whisper. I noticed my dad look down at his mug and I suspected it was to hide his suddenly damp eyelashes. “Christopher…” he breathed, refusing to look at me. “I don’t want to lose you too.”
What the hell was I supposed to say to that? ‘Oh okay then, Dad. I’ll stay alive just for you.’ I knew my anger was unjustified and so I swallowed it down with a sip of coffee.
“I don’t want it either,” I admitted.
“I’m so sorry, son. I’ve missed out on so much. I don’t deserve to be a father.”
“Whoa,” I said, straightening my back in my chair. “Don’t you start the feeling sorry for yourself bullshit. Whether you deserve to be or not, you are a father. So if your next line was going to be that you’d be better off leaving Emmie to get on with her life without you, don’t you dare. Don’t you fucking dare. You’ve let us both down, Dad. It might be too late to make it up to me but you better spend every single day of the rest of your life making it up to Emily.”
“I will. I swear I will.”
Nicola lives in Rochdale, England with her husband and four children (six if you include the dogs!) She is the author of New Adult/Contemporary romance novels Inevitable, Saving Amy and the Take My Hand series. When she is not busy playing with her imaginary book friends (or talking about them with real life friends!) she can usually be found carrying out her ordinary mum/housewife/all round slave duties. Oh, and if the kids ever ask, she moonlights as the Pink Power Ranger while they’re sleeping…
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